Thursday, September 10, 2009

The pitfall of Non-verbal communications


What i mean here is communications via msn, emails and sms messages. Basically any form of indirect communications. No doubt they are cheap, easy to use and save time sometimes. But are they are effective form of communication?
Lately i experienced the displeasure of being tangled up in a whorl of misunderstanding (or maybe not) as a result this. Why is it that misunderstanding  so easy to be invoked from msn or sms?
One reason is we cannot see the facial expression or gesture of the opposite party. Facial expression and gestures tell a lot about a particular person, whether he is in a happy or unhappy mood, angry or joking mode...Secondly, its even harder to detect whether the person is lying to u...because u cannot even see him/her. Thirdly, sms and msn with someone with poor english background can be disastrous, for the obvious reason.
Usually what happens to me is...the person make some distasteful remarks via msn or sms. Maybe he is just joking. But I may never know. After i read the sms i will be very pissed off and retaliates with a defensive reply or counterattack so to say. And things start to get ugly from there. Obviously when both sides are on the heat of the argument, calling the opposite is not an option. U are so near to me, just a call distance. But the same time u are so far away from me......
I have lost one or two friendships due to this very reason. Do i regret it? I frankly have no idea....It could really be a misunderstanding, but it could also mean that we are not really that compatible with each other.....
I treasure the time we have spent together....Though we may be no longer friends but i wish u all the best.....

5 comments:

Gratitude said...

Totally agree with you. Communication should be a combination of all senses, made almost redundant with the introduction of gadgets. These days I find myself to be extra careful too, coz you'll never know how peeps react, especially since there are so many emos out there. Face-to-face meets over good food or even copious cuppas are still the best options!

Have a great weekend ya! ^_^
+Ant+

bluesoul said...

Ant: yup...sometimes i even have to downgrade my vocabulary and sentences to avoid misunderstandings. How amusing! :P

savante said...

Not easy without words :) Relying on non-verbal communication, we tend to make mistakes.

Medie007 said...

as technology advances, we would prolly forget that convenience replaces human touch. that's why it's good not to take things too seriously, especially when it's something so virtual. but sometimes, when you really know the person, you can somehow imagine his/her facial expression. :)

bluesoul said...

savante: ur right. Face to face still the best. See the giggles, enjoy the drinks, share the laughter.....

Medie007: Well..i have always been taking things a little bit too seriously i think. Gonna change that when im on the virtual line.